Anyone remember the saga of the Doom Tit?

[tattooofhername]

Well, it's back.

Left side is now at least an entire cup size bigger than the right. No warning of any sort, no 'oh, by the way'... just BOOM! Huge tit overnight. It's tender, but not sore, and awkwardly firm in that 'you're pregnant!' way. Again.

One thing I know for sure: I'm definitely not pregnant.

It's going to be fun to see if this goes the same way as last time. First the Doom Tit, then both of them freak out, then I show as 'maybe, kind of, is that a blue line or not?' on pee tests but the blood test says no, then I start lactating, then in about three months time I have the period from hell and everything deflates again.

Heh. Maybe my body knows it's nearly time for this coil to come out. Last time I was working with babies almost full time, it was fucking up my hormones all over the place. I really wish I knew what the hell the deal was with this time. I've not been NEAR any babies.

ETA - Oh gods, I just realized. This is probably a fucking cyst, isn't it? I have a cyst fucking with my hormones and making me think I'm knocked up...

Comments

[rikibeth.livejournal.com]

Yeah, a cyst is definitely on the short-list of Things What Could Be Causing This. Ouch.

[tattooofhername.livejournal.com]

Last time we figured it was a combo of having a mirena coil fucking with my hormones and working with very small babies that did it. Apparently phantom pregnancies aren't uncommon among daycare workers because of the way our brains are wired to respond to crying babies. To the point where when I started lactating at work during a particularly stressful day, my manager was all 'Oh god, you're one of THOSE.'

This time around there is no such excuse, so not only is it scarier and infinitely more frustrating, it probably also means that this won't be the last time.